Thursday, June 26, 2014

Finding our groove

Yep, summertime comes with changes. Change in my work schedule ( to night shift) and the kids off of school.

Kids thinking they NEED stuff to do.

And sometimes they do--- but also, sometimes they have to learn it's okay to not have 24 hr entertainment scheduled for them.

The little girls are doing Vacation Bible School this week. Lots of fun there.

Phoebe also had an evaluation for her to have instruction for cane use. 

 It's NOT something she HAS to do, she's got enough vision to "get by" but in wanting her to have as much independence as possible it's important to teach her to use a white cane, not only for her to be able to navigate any unknown places when she's older but it will also identify her as a person with visual deficits for others to know and provide her with more safety.

And it's easier to learn at her age than to try to teach her when she's older. As usual, she totally drew in the instructor in her brightness and fun, sunshine like personality.

Someone else who was smiling today?  Paisley.

This week we had a follow up appointment with her rheumatologist.  I'll admit I was worried. Couldn't help it. Her mobility had decreased so much that she was unable to get her own sandal on her foot Sunday and asked for help. Something she NEVER does unless she HAS to.

As well, getting up our steps was a long, hard process, taking 10+ minutes to get up 13 steps and her really pulling/hanging on the handrail. It's just downright painful to watch her struggle some times. 

So I wasn't surprised when the doc said her hips are not good. We are going to do X rays to check them later this week, but her hip mobility is at about 0. She actually has to waddle to be able to walk forward, there's almost no movement at all of her hips. We will be referred to a pediatric orthopedic surgeon about double hip replacement:(

But one positive from her visit-- her knee was really swollen and flaring.  So doc injected it. And today Paisley came up the steps saying "Look at me running up the steps."  Such a funny girl, running up the steps:))

But seriously it took her about 2 minutes, with only holding on to the rail, not having to use it to pull herself up each and every step. HUGE difference for her.

And she's happier (aren't we all?) when she feels better and can move better, although I included this picture for fun, you see they aren't all smiles and sweetness- ha ha-- there's some snot dished out here for sure (And she's not the only one either)!

Speaking of moving-- not us, we are not moving. But my brother moved 2 YEARS ago and when he bought his house it had purple, deep purple walls--- incredibly U-G-L-Y. I told him-- don't worry about that, we can paint those walls. OIY. 2 years ago:(

Well---I had 2 days off and when I got off work one morning we took off.  It was a 2 day marathon of painting. Got the living room, up the steps, entry way all painted a lovely green/ tan shades. Started a yellow/ green combo in the kitchen. 

The kids had a blast, dad took some of them biking on the trails of a nearby park. Kat helped with painting projects, and Phoebe was thrilled to play all day with her cousin Jerry (age 7).  They played cars, pretended to shoot cars, played some more cars. 

Now there's no more purple on brother's walls, a soon trip will be for stenciling his kitchen and trim painting.  Then they can enjoy their walls, feeling like it's finally "their HOME,"  colors THEY like and chose, applied and live with:)

Chloe got herself in trouble this past week and regressed to pouting/sleeping for hours to avoid being in trouble. Have I mentioned it takes YEARS for adjustments with teen adoptions??

Yep, after going overnight with friends previously and me telling her she didn't even let us know she got there safe, not a peep from her the whole time and telling her very clearly that was NOT acceptable, she did it again.

And was called on it. SO she reacted like she used to-- sleeping/ pouting, not coming out of her room. Till we called her out on that........ 

Sometimes the burden of teaching, the fears of "will they ever get this,"  the lack of maturity is incredibly frustrating.  And yes, we understand they are teens, and many teens react in similar ways, not all behaviors are adoption related anymore. Some of it's just plain TEENAGERS.

But we plug away at the behaviors, because we have to. We aren't doing them any favors to allow things to slide. Because it's cute to see a 6 year old slurp food, not so cute at 17.  It's understandable that they come off as "in your face and space" because it's normal in their culture, but here they come off as rude.

The social lessons are some of the hardest and longest teachings we have had to do, and seriously they have even gone so far as to say "Nah" when told something they are doing needs to be changed or they will be offending people. 

 They don't want to believe us. FRUSTRATING for sure. (Did I mention they are TEENAGERS?)

Someone who is making better strides with listening and behavior-- Phoebe:)

Yep, she seems to be settling down and we have addressed many of her behaviors. 

 Now, do not worry, she still talks constantly, there's nothing gonna squash that spirit (nor do we ever want to do that to ANY of the kiddos) but the understanding of "We've got your back and we are telling you things to teach you, not so you can be in trouble for not doing them" is sinking in.  FINALLY.

It's good to see. Very good. 

She's got such an outgoing personality it's hard to see her struggle with understanding this whole "being parented is a good thing/bad thing" issue.

The girls were so funny when I told them I wanted pictures for the blog--- Kat Paisley and Chloe took "selfies", Chance complained when Kat caught him in the girls' room for his picture, oh goodness, he's in their room-- as if he never goes in there?

Their (Chance, Phoebe, Paisley, Kat) summer obsession has been playing their Nintendo games, since none of the teens are gainfully employed yet. And hanging out in their jammies. And sleeping in.....

All those things they "never" get to do during the school year.  

A nice break, a different pace, getting used to it and enjoying extra time with this crew:) 

Yep finding the summer groove. We do it every year..........

2 comments:

Dottie P said...

Great post and pictures! So glad Paisley got some relief and will get more in the future with the hip replacement! Thank you for all that you and your husband do!

lalalorlor said...

Hurray for a cane for Phoebe! It might be a battle at first (still is with my son - he's had his cane for 5 years) to get her to take her cane EVERYWHERE when she leaves the house but she has to in order to make it important to have. The one thing I had to tell my kids was NO HIGH STICKING!! Keep that cane tip on the ground! :)