Monday, March 25, 2013

Spring?

The calendar says it's SPRING. 

Some rodent said it was coming- I vote we hurt the little rodent named Phil.  After all he was wrong, very, very wrong. Shame on him. Getting us all thinking it wouldn't look like this out-----

Yep. That's our world this morning AGAIN.  School cancelled for the day.  IEP meeting for Phoebe, rescheduled. Dentist office to fix her remaining bad teeth, closed. Have to go tomorrow.  Good thing because I wasn't looking forward to trying to get out in this fluffy (although beautiful) stuff. 'Cause it's still coming down.

Now I have not given up hope that spring is, indeed, coming at some point because before this snow I saw the beginnings of my tiger lily plant coming up:)) So there IS hope that SPRING is gonna find it's way here.

What have we been up to? Well, Phoebe has shown us her birthday gifts over and over, let's just say the F*rby gift was less than bright on our part-- why? Well, the little booger burps, pretends to vomit, he speaks a weird, unknown-to-anyone-language that Phoebe is now repeating. Oops. Not good. Bad enough we need her to learn English but Furbyish? OIY.   

I worked Friday night, slept 2 1/2 hrs and went off to the eye doctor. Not Phoebe this time. Camden, who will be the "not so proud" owner of glasses when they are done this week. 

 And Chloe, who I had to drag in- even though she does NOT have to wear her glasses.

 Her eyes are no worse, which was my main concern, and her glasses give her headaches, so she has doc approval to go without the glasses.

She wanted us to "not care" and not take her to the exam.  Not gonna happen daughter o' mine. Even if you don't like it.

  She was even able to smile afterwards, not so for Camden:(

The staff  at the eye clinic were funny, dad was working so I went with all 7 kids. They thought ALL of the kids had appointments- ha ha. I told them I never do that to any office.

 We did have fun when the Easter Bunny came through, Phoebe wanted to keep the Easter Bunny to "play" she doesn't realize  bunny isn't REAL.  Very cute though:)

Then later in the day Dad and I, you are reading this right----- WENT ON A DATE. Now, let me tell you, we haven't done this in a year. GASP. A year?

 Yeah, time flies. I can't say "when we are having fun" because we felt kinda battered by some of the teens this week. 

So we needed the time away. We enjoyed a nice supper (I had a coupon for it MOM) and we did a little shopping, forgetting/not getting what we went for. Is that maybe an excuse to do it again?-- he he he he.  

Derrik came and babysat.  He even survived all 7 of them (MOM). He didn't even call or text once. The house was still standing and he was NOT tied up and beaten when we got home. Dishes were even washed!  I think we should do that more often maybe?

One thing I did buy  was this and was exclaiming how much I adored it because, well look at it, it's ALMOST as cute as our girls----

AND I was so tickled to have our cashier say "Hey, I want to adopt!!"  WHOOO HOOOO. I love to hear that. And I gave her lots of info, so she can get to it!  Kids are waiting. Let's get 'em HOME.  With a mom, a dad, wanted, loved, CHOSEN.  I wanna hear from you, I believe her name was Jessica?  

And trust me when I tell you homegrown, adopted, there's not a bit of difference in how you feel, your love, they are your CHILD. I'm a momma of many, of foster, step, adopted, bio,  ALL children of my heart that I love. Would do anything for them.  

Including tackling making a quilt out of this adorable fabric?  Gonna try. Not showing you all my end results unless it's very good- ha ha.

So as no week seems to be without incident, no, that would be wayyyyy too boring (have I mentioned I like BORING?)  We learned our children are up to no good at school. Humm. 

Those older teens, choosing not to go to classes that they were supposed to be in, being rude to ESL teacher and other kids, the list goes on.

We have to tell certain ones that we are NOT here to learn how to be orphans from them, they are here to learn how to be a part of this family. They bring behaviors that are great to make it in an orphanage, not so hot in a family.

Some of the orphanage behaviors are really, really tough to get an older child to overcome. The competition aspect is a huge one. The manipulation to get what they want is another big one for our teens at times.  And  sometimes they are just being a  typical teen- for sure-- because they ARE teens.  Working thorough, figuring out where things are coming from is not fun but needed for their emotional growth. 

It seems  that the ease at which Phoebe has come in to this family has been hard on the teens who struggle.  It's hard for them to see her accept everything so easily when they struggle with their life.  Just today I had a talk with Paisley who said she never wanted to leave China:(

And I told her as I've told Chase, they are allowed to feel that way. For sure. Because they did agree to be adopted but they were essentially clueless as to how hard it was gonna be. 

So since there is no going back at this point they must decide what to do about it. Will they decide to be miserable, pouting, crying, unhappy. Or will they try to make things as best they can, work on learning English, make friends, make their way here with our support, help and love.

It's hard when you want to fix all these things for our children. I mean, we love them so much. But honestly only THEY can choose to do what they need or not. We will still be here for them we just have to watch them hinder themselves which is hard to accept. 

Sometimes it seems like all we can do is love them as God wants us to and wait for them. And patience has not been a strong suit of mine.

Growing and stretching and I'm not talking about the kids:) I'm talking about me, needing God to get through therefore growing with Him as He strengthens me and keeps me going when it seems an impossible task at times.

Celebrating the little things, as hard as Phoebe's easy adjustment has been for some, it's also been a way to show the tougher ones how easy it is to hug us, to show love, acceptance of their life here, thankfulness for everything. (We do not expect them to gushingly thank us for everything but to show respect for us is expected.)

 Because the teens know we have done/do the same for them we are doing for her. And Miss Sunshine thanks us for fixing her teeth, eye exams, groceries, any new clothes, it's really sweet, although, again, not necessary but it sure is easier to want to do things for someone who is so appreciative compared to people who don't show respect, let alone say thanks or be kind when helped.

Phoebe easily accept and loves them as her brothers and sisters.  No one is immune, nor should they be.  She trust and expects she will be cared for, and she will, but she is also thankful and kind when helped. A good example for certain ones who can't get a "do over" in life and are now seeing some areas where they are still lacking skills. 

We were surprised when Chance took a turn at the misbehaving, usually he is fairly easy-going.  Although once we had a talk with him he came and apologized and hugged me.  They have such precious hearts, they really do. It's hard to be "tough" on them at time but they don't have a whole lot of time to get this and they all have been home long enough to realize there are certain behaviors that are okay and ones that are not and they are choosing which to do.


But speaking of  very precious hearts makes me think of  Kat, who had a small relapse of the green eyed monster called ENVY-- over Phoebe's birthday last week but otherwise has found her way to be a wonderful, caring and helpful sister.  

She has been terrific in school and at home. Phewww. Such a relief and God provided help for her to find peace with this new sister.  No crying spells, no claiming she is not as "loved " AS IF.  Silly, silly girl.  

They went out in this late snow and made this snowman together.  He's got Kat's ear muff's on, because every snowman has cold ears, don't ya know? 

3 comments:

Dottie P said...

Hi, Vicki,

It has snowed all day in KY too!
I'm praying for you and all of the adjustments and recurring bad behaviors and/or bouts of unhappiness, and that you just have stamina and joy to counteract it all (which from your comments, I know you do). But I am so glad you and Ron got a night out!!! You did need that! Thanks for the update!

Sherri said...

I wonder how many people are just sick of the snow? I bet lots...that's why more and more move to Florida. Is it snowing here? NO!! But it's cold, it's crazy cold. This time last year we were swimming in our pool and we can't seem to get it warm enough to do that because of the cold nights...ok, am not bragging, but I will take Florida any day over really cold winters and snow that you eventually get sick of. It's a beautiful day here, sun is brightly shining, but too cold for me to open my windows..lol

Monkey Tales said...

Caidi received a Furby for Christmas. We had to return it to Santa after the Dog walked by it (tail probably hit it)during the night and the Furby decided to talk to the dog. Freaked her out so much I had to get up and put the Furby in the car. Another not so "bright" idea :).