Friday, October 19, 2012

Hey there

Hi there. Miss me? Apparently mom did because I've been told to get off my duff and blog.  I kid you not (Told you I'd tell on you MOM)

What have I been up to?  I have to spill. Nothing super exciting, interesting for sure. I *could* make you all guess but that would be another call from MOM so I won't be going there.

We took a child for respite (a break from their family MOM) when the family was in crisis.  It's been an interesting time, she thought she would hit it off with Chloe but she hit it off with Paisley instead. 

It's been a busy time. The girls have curled hair, painted nails, tried out my make up.  They've also gotten in trouble. It seems this child struggles because she divides and conquers, I mean she literally got Paisley to pair up with her against the other teens here. I saw what was happening and put my foot down very fast and very hard.

I told ALL I will not tolerate their behavior and I split her and Paisley up and forbid Chinese speaking.  Respite girl tried to give me her reasons for what she did and I gave her the reasons it was NOT okay to do so. She continued to tell me over and over why she did what she did. And I continued to tell her why she could NOT do what she did.

I didn't think I got through to her but she came to me the next day and told me she understood what I had told her and she was sorry. She has since made great effort to spend time with Chloe, as well as Paisley.

It's interesting because it shows us our limitations, yes, we do have them.  Not that she is "too much" but that our children in our home have limitations and I have often said to hubby that I do not ever want our kids to revert to orphanage behaviors and not get what family is about.

It's very touchy with our teens, as to how hard it is to maintain the right balance and reminds me even more how God got brought us Paisley who is a perfect fit here. It hard to explain but too many teens and the kids start to feel they have to go back to survival of the fittest and they get mean and nasty with each other. They fight over E-V-E-R-Y-T-H-I-N-G.  Not fun when you are parenting them. Not teaching love and kindness to your siblings because they are family.

I'm very glad we were able to see this issue arise and head it off, as well as the kids responding right away to being told to "knock it off."  I think in some ways with Paisley being our newest that she has had some feelings of being the "lesser" one here, which is not true. But it was clear when the issues arose she had been feeling this way and her feelings were acknowledged and dealt with. She now feels more "on equal ground" as the teens, who have been here longer. 

It's really typical for a new child to feel like they aren't as important as kiddos already in a family. So to overcome this is progress of her blending into our family.

What else has been going on? Birthday central here. Not kidding. Malaree turned 21 on Wed. And then Kat turned 9 yesterday and I turn beeeeeeep tomorrow.  We've had cake galore. 


 Kat's birthday was a multi affair. What does that mean?  WELL-- Princess Kat had to have a fancy dress she chose for school. As well as cupcakes for her class. And extras too, for "other people." She also had to have a gift to open on her day, so she got some boots, and H*llo Kitty pj's. And cake. It's not a birthday without cake. Not even with the promise of a double party for her and Mal tonight. NOPE.

So cake again tonight, as well as more gifts. The word SPOILED came to mind, for some odd reason.


Tomorrow is my "big day." All I want is-------hummmm--- plane ticket money??  Yep, it would be nice to see that fee all ready to go. We are waiting for visa paperwork and getting excited about these last few steps being quick and the end result being our travel to Phoebe.

We are anxiously waiting on an update on her. It didn't come yet, so maybe that will be my late birthday gift?  

We will have to see. So now I spilled all that's up, I'll have to find time to tell you all some of the funny things the kids have said lately.  I'll tell you one of them- that Chloe, she says to me "Hey, how come we respite kids, you never send us anywhere, why aren't you sick of us?"  Uh, because respite doesn't mean a family is sick of their child- CHLOE--   OIY, that girl. Trust me when I say that our kids keep us well entertained:)

7 comments:

Almond Tea said...

I can't believe you say, "Not much is going on here. By the way, we took in another child for a while." It just goes to show what an amazing person you are.

I don't know if anyone has every said it, so I'll tell you now. The world is better place with you in it.

You are amazing.

Love for Lilly Yin said...

Happy Birthday sweet friend!

Maria said...

Happy Birthday!

thesleepyknitter said...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!! :-)

I hope it is a good and happy day in which every gets along peacefully.

I love your blog. You have so much good insight, and I feel like we learn from you about both our past and present issues in raising children.

I have been thinking about all your respite care all week and praying for you and am impressed with your quick intervention when there was some trouble. You are the right mama for this crew!

Blessings from the SleepyKnitter clan. :-)

Colleen said...

Happy Birthday, Vickie! I hope you had a great day!

You really are amazing! I'm not sure I could do what you do so graciously.

K said...

Well, Happy Birthday! I spoke to you almost every day this week and didn't read the one blog post that would give me the secret, that you had a birthday!!! Thank you so much for the respite call tonight, I'm going to hire a babysitter this week and sit through two straight movies!

Sherri said...

Thanks for the laugh!! Chase's plan...that sounds exactly like something Zeke would say. So funny :):)