Thursday, December 15, 2011

Not just me

I was in the store the other day, saw a woman I have known for years.  A wonderful Christian woman.  Wonderful.  And she said to me, as many people do "Hi, how are you?"

And the "pat" answer that I have been taught to give "Fine, and how are you?" refused to come out of my mouth. I said "I'm not great, I'm struggling."  And I saw the understanding in her eyes. And I knew I was MEANT to share with her, I'm having a hard time right now.

My issue is pretty much one thing, although other "things" add to it.  It's the Season.  I care so much about my God, about honoring Him, that this season hurts.  How commercialized it has become, how lost we have become from the purpose of even celebrating this holiday.  

This is for Jesus. His Birth. The miracle that was and IS. That God sent this Son to live here among us, to feel what we feel, live as we lived, to teach, to perform miracles that strength us to this day, then to go on and be hung on a cross for OUR sins, DYING for US.  I get chills just writing this! So incredibly special.  God knows how much we love our children, how much we see them as a gift, as He felt this way about HIS SON.

Oh, How much our Father LOVES us. YOU.  Lil' ol' ME.  

He sees my hurt for this season gone off course (in my opinion) where we feel we have to buy more, bigger, better, and we get LOST in the hype.  I've really struggled with this for years, and just never put it in words.

It comes to me once I have everything done, all gifts bought, most wrapped, our Christmas ham in the freezer.  I have concerns- will the kids enjoy their gifts? Did we get enough? Did we get too much?  Do we have enough decorations?  Who will come for dinner?

This is when it hits me.  The sadness.  The wrongness of hearing "Happy Holidays" instead of "Merry Christmas".  Knowing we are supposed to be rejoicing in the birth of our Savior, yet people are hurting.  It's hard to be M-E-R-R-Y.

But then I realize even though I am hurting, others are too.  I shared with the friend I ran into, that the season wasn't being treated for what it should be, an HONOR of our God.  And she agreed and told me she struggles with this too.  We left each other with a hug, and a renewed sense of what the season means to us, as Christian women. 

That we can find in each other, the meaning.  It's not money, gifts, glitter and fanfare. It's not about kids who may not be happy with what they got.  It's not worrying about the finances of Christmas. 

It's about the miracle that happened so many years ago, when God sent us His SON, the birth of this precious babe, in a stable, no frills, no decorations, no wrapping paper. BUT the greatest gift He could give US. 

We need to get back to that miracle gift. To remember the season is about JESUS, His birth.  And as such, that God loves us as His children.  Each of us. We are soooo special to Him.  He knows how many hairs are on each of our heads. He knows our strengths, our weaknesses, He forgives us, He knows our hearts.  

I'm so glad for the sharing of your needs with me. It's made me feel like I can do something important, something that is meaningful in this season gone wrong- something that gets ME back to where we should be.

Praying for others. Caring.  Knowing God is with us, walking beside us and even carrying us when needed. His Arms are around us.  His love for us is unending. His miracles do continue, we have seen it in our own family with the miracle of the boys coming home to us- reuniting with their sister. It was ALL His doing.

My spirit is renewed for this year, I will be focused on the true meaning of Christmas.  
I will be praying for all of you who left comments, and hoping more will share because I am praying and God hears each of our prayers.  EVERY SINGLE PRAYER.  He knows the needs. 

 He can and WILL be there for each one of us.  Doesn't matter who you are, where you come from, how big or little your issue is, what you have done in the past, what you are doing wrong today.

 It can be something tough, or even a JOY that He has done for us.  God LOVES prayers of thanks, of joy.  He's there for it ALL.

I'm humbled today to be one of HIS children. 


Andi said...

Merry Christmas!
I agree with you completely. I went to my nieces concert this week and asked my other niece who is in another school district when her program was going to be held. She told me not until spring...her school doesn't want to offend anyone and therefore no longer has a Christmas program. Well, I'm offended!!!!

bbmomof2boys said...

This is probably the first year I haven't felt like a tree up but that's it, no decorations, nothing. I LOVE Christmas but this year? I don't know...just not feeling it..was disappointed with the Church's childrens program this year (long story), missing my mom terribly...sounds like I need to take a knee!