Monday, March 7, 2011

Faces of Special Needs Adoption

A big discussion going on right now in the adoption community is about Special Needs adoption.

About the children, the real faces behind the almost 2000 children (no pictures) listed on a BIG list waiting, waiting, waiting for a family to say- "hey, I wonder what #1398, limb difference, cranial malformation- girl 2003 is about?" Could we handle that? Is that OUR daughter?

This is what that child looks like---
Yep, it's none other than-- Miss Kitty.

A limb deformity that actually means she has a toe that is larger than normal because an extra toe started to grow then stopped, giving her a slightly larger 5th toe, a double toe nail and her 4th and 5th toes are webbed.
It's actually pretty hard to notice. I can't even get it to show up in a picture for you to see it! Her foot looks like any other little girl foot:)

The "cranial difference?" A translation error when trying to describe her toe being bigger because in Ch*na they call their "big toe" the "head" and that got translated to something going on with her head.

Is she anything less than PERFECT to us? Nope. Not one bit. I wonder sometimes how we lived before we had our Miss Kitty, her unprompted little hugs she gives throughout the day, the "I love you and I am so glad you are my mommy (daddy)." She is a totally love bug. I dare you to find the "not perfect" in her.

Then came Chloe. Age was her special need. Too old for many to even consider. Matter of fact, WE had thought 9 or 10 year old. But when we saw Chloe's picture we knew she was "the one." Her age, but a number. Again, perfect fit.

The boys. They too were too old. Had sat on agency list after agency list, never chosen. We know why now. They were meant to be our sons. Their age, also just a number. They are now our sons. Do they look to you like they didn't NEED parents to love them?

All 4 of these children- Special- you BET! The need?? OURS. For them, to be their parents. Our life would be so empty without them. It's hard to imagine.

Should anyone consider SN adoption? Do you have the NEED? The special will come. It's an amazing blessing. Are you ready to be blessed? Then get going! Right this second you can pray, donate to someone adopting, get started on adopting, from anywhere. 147 million orphans, God has a blessing waiting for you.

As far as the "needs?"Well, God gives each of us special talents, that's what makes it so wonderful to be part of this world. We are all different. Each one of the children out there, needing parents, there are mothers, fathers out there for each one of them.

No matter their needs. I've heard time and time again, parents that find that they live near a hospital that specializes in what their child's medical need is. Or they have a great community already in place for their child's SN. They only have to access it. God has that all worked out:)

It's a matter of looking past a big scary worded LABEL and seeing THE FACE. Your child. No matter what label has been applied. The label might be right. It might be wrong. But it's NOT who your son or daughter is. No WAY!

To each family, their child is PERFECT. In their life for a reason. No matter their former LABEL. They are a JOY unsurpassed. DO you need a little JOY???


Robyn said...

Love it, Vickie!

Brian said...

Can I advocate for epilepsy kids. My bio daughter was born "normal" and then developed a seriously rare epilepsy disease. I always get a little protective for the ones that have had one seizure (could have been a one time event due to fever) or are on meds and fine. Epilepsy is easy. There are so many things to be done. I always find myself pointing them out to my husband and saying, "look, that one only had one seizure." Sadly they tend to stay on the lists.

Kelly said...

Sorry, I wrote the above comment from my husband's account not mine.

Lori Lynn said...

I think any child having to be adopted from an orphanage should be considered "special needs". They all have issues, and sometimes the emotional ones are more challenging than the physical ones.

We found our second daughter Pearl on a Waiting Child list. It said she had a slight case of "brain paralysis" but had recovered. The only symptoms they mentioned were poor muscle tone in her legs. We went in anticipating the worst, and it turned out that our Pearl was not only perfectly healthy, but she was also too smart for her own good! She did have some childhood asthma, but she seems to have outgrown that. I think if you go into this equipped to deal with the worst scenario, you will be able to handle the results. I actually felt guilty going home with a perfect child when we had signed on for special needs.

Thanks for keeping us aware!

Hunan Mommy said...

Another mom of a special need child here! Well said!

JShannon said...

Very well said.