Sunday, August 8, 2010

Chance cries

Poor little Chance. He was mad at Chloe today and he cried to me. First he sent me a little note, it was so cute, we were leaving church and it said "Chance no happy."

When I asked him what was wrong he said something about "Chloe" and he started crying. Turned out he was writing on the table in Sunday school and got yelled at by Chloe and in trouble from the teacher, of course. He knows better.

Then later when he was asking me about school, was I going to put him in 6 grade or 7. He badly wants to be in 7th with Chloe, but my concern is his lack of commitment to his work, he would rather be playing. This is not going to be acceptable in 7th grade. He started to cry. He was really upset. I told him I was starting him in 7th but if he didn't keep up with his work, he would go to 6th.

Why does it matter that he is crying? Well.... this is a child who, up until now, has only cried once that I know of in 3 months home. He has come to a place where he understands "WE CARE." If he is unhappy, or upset, or someone does something to him, WE are going to protect him, go to bat for him, want to fix it for him. It's HUGE that he is making this connection with us. We aren't just people taking care of him as our job, we are his parents. We went back for him to make him our SON, beloved, wanted, and we want him to be happy. Not just existing, not just because he was Chloe's twin.

It's a big part of the whole picture of the boys becoming part of our family. Not just the two boys that came with Chloe that we felt we "had" to go back for. I know for them anytime we have issues and we have to give them "a scolding" they are concerned that we aren't happy with them.

Another thing I have noticed. Chance is not worrying if mother is happy every minute of the day. He is not "knocking me over" to get something before I get it, trying to help. He will still help me anytime, but he doesn't have that "desperate to please" look about him anymore.

Chase on the other hand, has seemed to blend right in, he seems so much more comfortable with his place here. Not sure why that is. Maybe he is just holding his feelings in more? He has cried, when upset, but he has a totally different personality than the twins. The twins are "in your face, all about them, want this, want that NOW, gotta tell you something immediately," typical teen kiddos.

Chase has maintained that "more serious" personality with a neat touch of humor thrown in. He will say or do something funny when I least expect it. He gets the biggest kick out of Donovan, and laughs often at how he acts, things he says.

One of those things today? Donovan looked at Chloe ( it took him a full day to even notice his sister's new hair do) and he said "you look like Dora the Expl*xer. She came right back at him and said "you act like Bob the Build*r. Oh dear. Now we are slinging cartoon characters as insults to each other. Just act like brothers and sisters why don't ya?

Oh, yeah, they are:)

2 comments:

Holly said...

Sweet, normal kids. : ) I love it. : )

Lori Lynn said...

Chloe's new hairdo looks great. I am so happy to read that the boys are feeling more comfortable and are able to express their feelings. Reading your description of Chloe and Chance was as if I had written it about my daughter Pearl. And she isn't even close to being a teenager yet!