Saturday, February 27, 2010

Answers

It never ceases to amaze me the support from other adoptive families and people with a heart for adoption. It also never ceases to amaze me the non-support of families. What a bummer. You are sooo excited to announce you are adding to your family thinking everyone will be jumping for joy with you and instead they look at you like you have just said you are growing a cancerous horn from your head and think it's super.

My mom gently (I am a redhead) tried to tell me that "people" in the family want to know what we are going to do with all these kids. Also, why we want to go back for her brothers, where will we put them, and I am betting some other - NOT- SO- NICE- THINGS. I am glad my mom answered the way I wished, that (#1) we feel God is leading us on this journey and that's why we are doing it AND (#2) that it's important to us to keep the children together since they are siblings.

So instead of rising to the occasion of negativity, I decided to make this some fun. I thought of some reasons to give when anyone asks those really dumb questions and you just look at them and are speechless---here's going to be some of my answers............

Why do you NEED all those children---- well, they are really super to claim on the tax return and I really want to go to Hawaii some day. The no brainer answer we think is obvious---- there is no NEED, God has BLESSED us with each and every one of our children, no matter how they come to us.

Why are we going back--- well now, the Chinese food compared to here and there is nothing so we enjoy it so much we max out everything to go back as often as possible just to eat. The adoptions are just an excuse to eat. We really thought this was a no brainer, these are HER BROTHERS, to us that says it all.

What will you do with them all---- hummm.... try to get a TV spot for Ron and Vic & the mixed dozen? Hey why not, Jon and Kate are out of business and we have some really cute Asian faces around here. We live in PA too. Not far from where they film:) Again, no brainer---shame on us, we thought loving them, caring for them was enough ??

What if the boys are terrible for us-- well, there is a local jail and why not add to society's problems, they aren't getting any better. Really, really no brainer---we have never given up on any child and don't plan to start now. We'll cope with whatever comes.

MY ALL TIME FAVORITE- Does Ron know? Shhh, don't talk so loud, he might find out! Now really, come on. I am NOT that pushy. He's downsized and SOLD his NASCAR collection to make this happen, he is totally aware and wanting to do this. I have not twisted any arms, pleaded, or sprung any surprises on him, these are children, not dogs. For those who do not know me, I have sprung a few of the canine variety on hubby with no notice, NOT a good practice, has not gone well and I promised never to do it again. I admit it, MY BAD.

Just to add to this fun, I am going to share with you some of the initials for adoptions that make perfect sense to me, as I am the "paperwork woman" which is typical in adoptions, one person doing the papers to keep straight what needs done and when and why and how. But since hubby isn't involved I'll tell you what HE thinks they are---

SN means- Special Needs-hubby answer- Super Nice
PA- means - Pre Approval- hubby answer - short for Pennsylvania, where we live
LOI means- Letter Of Intent- hubby answer- Living Our Insanity
LID means-Log In Date-hubby answer- Looking In Disgust
LOA means -Letter Of Acceptance- hubby answer- Laughing at Our Age
USCIS- US immigration-hubby answer-United States, Civil Ideas Start
TA means-Travel Approval - he does know this one!!!

So I would say by when hubby knows the RIGHT answer you could say he gets involved there. Doesn't mean he isn't totally on board with the whole thing. He's just smart enough to get out of doing all that paperwork:)

Our financial update, we are $10 away from another $100 being knocked down , each donation counts!! $2610 of the $2700 final fee we need. YEAH! Now the not so super news. Was expecting the next step toward our Travel Approval to happen this week, then got a package in the mail today. One box checked wrong, they even put white out on the wrong answer but wouldn't check the right box, they sent it to me to recheck the right box:( AHHHHH. SO off it went again, and will arrive Monday so maybe next week will be the one for that. God's timing, God's timing, chanting it:)

11 comments:

Love for Lilly Yin said...

SOme people just do not get it, and they may never. Its okay though, some of us do get it in a big way. I applaud everything you are doing, and yes, it is a no brainier. I keep waiting for our tax money to come...you are on my list to give to!

April said...

One of my favorite sayings is "Those who matter don't mind and those who mind don't matter."

You are all awesome in this family's book!

Lara said...

Thanks for the giggles today! I've been silently following your story since Chloe came home and praying for your journey to bring home her brothers. I needed hear your uplifting responses as we are just beginning another paper chase for our sixth child, second by adoption. "Crazy" and "why" are a words we hear a lot these days.

Annie said...

Unbelievable!! If we ever adopt again, there are quite a few friends and family that will freak and wonder if we have lost our minds!! Why??? I just don't get it!! I think you have a beautiful family and beautiful hearts for going back to get "the brothers!"

Elissa said...

A lot of people didn't get what Jesus was doing either... :)

We only have one kid so I didn't get the same questions, but this was my favorite "fake" answer to the sometimes smug question of, "You do know your life is about to completely change, don't you?" I'd feign total shock and say, "NO! What do you mean?? We never would have gone through with this adoption if we would have known it was going to- GASP!-change things!"

Mandi said...

LOVE this! Some people just don't get it. I guess in the end the only people who really need to get it are us, and GOD.

I am hoping I will be able to use some of your excuses soon.

Mandi

Ladyblog said...

It's seems so strange to me when people don't understand adoption.... but there are soooo many people out there like that. My lovely MIL told us we had no business adopting #2. There is no doubt if I knew of a sibling or siblings we would adopt them. Congrats to you! It's so much nicer to live with an eternal perspective rather than a worldly one..........

Kelly said...

We were starting the process when my husband lost his job last summer. WE were quite disappointed that we would not meet financial requirements on my teaching salary, but we set it aside and just accepted that it wasn't our time yet. One family member expressed their "relief" to me by saying,"I am so glad you aren't adopting that little boy (he was 6), because we were so worried he wouldn't be attached, and (her husband) sees so many of these kids in his medical practice.

I just slowly hung up the phone. I think your family is doing a beautiful thing, and I look forward to reading about your travels, and bringing your boys home.

Krista said...

Your post was just hilarious! Thank you for making me smile!
I thought it was a no brainer to bring Chloe! she will be able to help so much in the transition of her brothers. We brought our daughters along for the adoption of our son, and I'd do it again in a heart beat! (although my wallet is still complaining!lol)
Krista D

Barbara A. said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Barbara A. said...

Vickie - just made a donation towards the last of the finances you need. Wish it could have been more! They'll be here soon!!

God Bless you all!
Barbara in CT
(LovingChinasChildren Yahoo Group)