What a change a few days can make in your life. Always remember that when you are down :)
Our biggest change is the baby boy. I spoke to mommy and we seemed to have gotten some misunderstandings out of the way. First and foremost she is his mommy. We WANT her to be his mommy and be in his life. We do not want to keep him from her and yet, his medical needs are so great he NEEDS to be living with a nurse (me) caring for him. And his condition will only worsen. Mommy knows that and with her not having good support she was worried she would not be able to care for him. She really loves him so much, that is obvious. So when we cleared up the fact we want her here and involved, we are a team in his care and more people to love him all the time, she said she wanted to leave him in our care.
We realize she can change her mind, but I feel we at least cleared up things that should have been brought up before but with us sick, sleep deprived and new baby in the house zombiness, we were not too clear beyond meeting baby's needs at first. I'm so glad she came over and we got the chance to discuss what is best for this precious baby boy. His mommy and I, his mum, are going to work on scrapbooks together for her and us to have a wonderful keepsakes of his life.
Yesterday our family ventured out for the first time with baby to go shopping, Kat needed socks, and we got the scrapbooking stuff. We also got the little man some hats. We seemed to miss buying all the stuff on our list, but Baba did find a TV he is interested in- a plasma one, of course. We are thinking MAYBE with our income tax or those nice economic boost checks we are supposed to get this spring. We will see.
Our boy, Jay, in Basic training is dying of starvation and cravings for chocolate. (can tell he's mine!) So we are blessed with foster children who have been in group placement where they apparently are taught all kinds of devious stuff, like how to hide things in shaving cream cans, etc. So we will be hiding chocolate and sending it on. SHHH- don't tell his fearless leader, if he is caught he will be doing push ups, but as long as they aren't coming to me and making me do the push ups, then fine by me :)
We are getting in the groove now of our baby days, showering before noon is not usual but at least showering every day is occuring:) I will be getting relief soon, there will be a few nights each week a nurse comes to do the night turn with Mr. T. So Mum doesn't get so run down she can't care for him. He is a bugger at night still, up many, many times. Can't seem to get a good place with him for comfort with his pump feedings. I'm sure it will be hard for me to realize someone else is going to get him and I can sleep thru, I hear his every grunt now, we laugh and say he sounds like a mad squirrel when is is gearing up to cry, not that he cries much during the day at all. Just when he needs something.
Kat is doing well thru all this, no jealously at all, she is very good about me needing to hold him often and with his issues. She said yesterday " baby have boo boo in his head and doctor fix it?" I said "No, doctor can't fix it." She said "he gonna die". I said "Yes, he will sometime, but not right now." She says then "Kat not have boo boo's in her head" and I agreed. That was the end of that. It's amazing how she can accept this better than many of us adults. We are just totally honest and take each day with him as a true blessing. Sleeplessness and all :)